現在很想見到你

Well...having thought for a while, I think I should write something about this.

I have to say I haven't realized how deeply I have been influenced by my previous relationship until I am stepping onto a new relationship. From the past experience, I have been trained not to believe what people say, to keep myself as an outsider, and to be self-protective. Not as brave and optimistic as before, I am now wandering between the uncontrollable passion and the contrallable normality of life. I know I really like him a lot, but meanwhile I am so afraid that my life will go back to the chaos once someone significant becomes a determinant of my happiness and sadness.

Fortunately, my friends are very supportive to me. They make me believe there is something worthy trying, and I should enjoy the special and rare feeling that he gives me. Just forget about the psychological theories such as "passionate love implies stupid love," and believe my feelings and intuition toward him. When thinking this way, yes, I feel powerful. I believe God really understands how hard I've tried to get over the inner pain and become happy. That's why God sent him to me so that I can bump into him in the Starbucks where I hardly go in the very night, and God will not let me down again.

His patience, warmth, and smile also comfort me a lot. I want myself to know that I am still capable to keep a good relationship...

You really can, Pey!